37 1/2 Weeks

This is what I look like this week, at 37 1/2 weeks pregnant. However big I look, I guarantee you I feel bigger. I have very regular Braxton-Hicks contractions (sooo not “false” contractions, let me tell you), skin so itchy and raw that I can’t sleep, and lots of pressure and soreness in places I won’t mention or describe. I am a poster-child for the pregger waddle and move at a rate of speed not unlike that of a turtle, and that’s when I’m booking it. God forbid I make the mistake of getting down on the floor; getting up again is a struggle of mammoth proportions. My hands are swollen, my feet are flat. I’m done. Aria’s Itsy Bitsy Yoga instructor told me that the mark of readiness for labor is when 30hrs of it starts to sound good. Bring it on, I say. Let’s get this party started. Whenever this little lady is ready to make her appearance, I’m happy to have her and the sooner, the better.

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